


COCKroaches

by Anonymous



Category: Persona 5, The Wacky Adventures of Ronald McDonald (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Cockroaches, Jared the cockroach, Light Dom/sub, M/M, McDonalds Sex Club and Restaurant, i am so sorry to the people who read this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-24
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-15 23:35:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28946757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Ronald invites Goro back to his bachelor's pad for a romantic evening meal but things go... Awry.
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Ronald McDonald
Comments: 5
Kudos: 4
Collections: Anonymous





	COCKroaches

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fret](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fret/gifts).



Goro’s shift had just come to an end. He knotted his fingers and pushed outwards in a stretch , hearing a crack. Naked underneath, he took off his apron and threw it onto the grill, setting fire to it immediately.

“Good day at work, darling?” Ronald asked.

Goro jumped at his presence.

“R-R-R-Ronald…” he said, sounding like a lawnmower starting up.

The clown daddy pointed to the security camera fixed in the top corner of the room.

“I’ve been watching you… All day…”

Goro’s breathing softened. His shoulders were low; his whole frame like that of a pet, transfixed with a laser dot bouncing off the furniture.

“A 24 hour shift, huh?” Ronald commented, looking off to the side. “I’m surprised you're still able to stand.

“I  _ am _ your capitalist slave after all. I’ll work until I can’t keep going.” In a dramatic motion, that of the damsel in distress of old movies, he pinned the back of his hand to his head. His knees buckled inwards. “But oh! I am just  _ so weak _ . I’ll be... Falling to my knees in no time.” If Goro could’ve ended that sentence with a winking emoji, he would’ve, but this was real life, so he couldn’t, fucking obviously.

“Well then, I think you deserve a treat.”

You could nearly hear him panting.

He was so grateful to be treated as something  _ more _ than a mere slave. He dreamed of a future with Ronald. Of lazy days on the sofa, romantic walks through the parks, making a fire mixtape based on their relationship.

Even one day, walking down the aisle to meet that man in his jarring yellow and red tuxedo.

A hapless smile.

One day.

All Ronald had to do was convince Goro that he loved him enough to make things serious.

That moment came sooner than he thought.

“You should come back to my place, baby gorl.”

It was just a dinner date. Just some food, then he’d go back home, maybe kiss Ronald goodnight, nothing much.

Sure, he’d gotten railed in the bathroom and had his ass split beyond recognition, but there’s no way they’d be fucking in his house.

It was the McHoly Land.

They’d driven to his apartment in Ronald’s Mercedes S-Class, but Goro spent the whole journey twiddling his thumbs and awkwardly looking out the window.

He couldn’t pinpoint why he was feeling so nervous about this. The perfect opportunity to confess his true feelings of love to Ronald was speeding towards him, and the thought was sending a burning sensation up his chest.

When they’d arrived through the front door, the clown dropped his bags, and without even a second look at Goro called out,

“Jared, I’m home!”

Icy water crashed down Goro’s back. He observed the scene to watch this ‘Jared’ walk in, with a sudden cynicism of everything he laid eyes on.

But with tunnel vision on all the doors in sight, it took him a moment to realise Ronald was looking down.

His coat still in hand, face glazed over with bewilderment, he saw Ronald squatting down softly stroking Jared, his pet cockroach.

A huffed laugh escaped him.

“A… Roach? Are you trying to bring the restaurant home?” he managed to say through an awkward chuckle.

“He’s from your location, actually. I brought the wittle guy home a while back.” As if talking about stealing a grape from a vine, he threw his head back at Goro, and his red afro bounced with him. “There’s enough of them to go around, one won’t go amiss.”

“Oh, do they settle in the ball pit?”

“No, baby gorl, they usually lie in the bed covers.”

“... Then what wrapped about my foot when I stepped in the ball pit last week?”

He was too focused on showering Jared with attention to answer.

His gloved fingers span around its antennae. It jumped up and landed in Ronald’s massive hands, resting easily in the palm. The connection between them was palpable, and while Goro’s jealous rage had been shattered by the surprise, the more he watched the two interact, the more that feeling came creeping back inch by inch.

Both intrigued and distrubed, he dropped his fat ass on the couch and seductively crossed his legs.

“I believe you mentioned dinner?”

“Yes, yes, that’s right.” He set Jared down onto the counter and got to work.

As this is meant to be smut, I’m not going to narrate Goro being bored in an apartment - you can roleplay that yourself.

ANYWAY,

4 hours had passed. Jared was long gone, out on a walk. And the poor, empty-assed twink had spent his time noticing the obscurities around the apartment. Namely the overpriced and sticky anime figurine of Hinata Hyuga and a high ceiling with rafter beams from which hung fairy lights and Grimace’s dead body.

His tedium was broken when Ronald stepped out of the kitchen, dripping with sweat. He removed the blood-stained dish towel from over his shoulder to wipe his face. “All done, my dear. I hope you like it.”

He beckoned him over the table and pulled out his chair. Ahead of Goro, in the dim candlelight, there was a bottle of champagne in an ice bucket sat atop a blanket of rose petals.

Well that was enough to make Goro wanna get smashed into next week.

The clown daddy strutted out with a cloche plate cover between his hands. He set it down and whipped the covering off to reveal…

A gorgeous sirloin stea-

Just kidding it’s a McChicken and fries.

The empty-ass feeling spread throughout his body as he realized he’d wasted 4 hours. He brushed his fingers through his hair.

“...Ahh...Nice...Well, I just remember I had this case I need to work on so I better be going. I mean, take-out’s just as good, right?”

The plate cover hit the table and clattered over the silver cutlery.

“You’re still working at the Special Investigation Department?” His harsh tone struck fear into Goro’s heart like the true little bitch boy he was. “I thought you said you weren’t working anywhere other than the McDonalds? You lied to me. I spent hours cooking you a lovely meal and you  _ lied to me _ .”

That bitterness…

That pain in his voice…

“No no no no no! You’ve got it all wrong, Daddy. I was just pursuing a case in my own time. Old habits, dying, and being hard and all that, I promise!”

Goro grabbed the burger and stuffed it into his Louis Vuitton bag all that bottoming had earned him. There was an awful silence in the room as he excused himself, and it was only as Goro’s hand reached for the front door handle that that silence was interrupted.

A soft pitter-patter - like rain falling against a window. A throaty whine. Before long it was full blown sobbing.

He turned around to see Ronald crying greasy tears laced with pleading and pathetic whimpers.

“Don’t leave me, please! This isn’t what I wanted. I-I just wanted a nice e-evening with you- I just-”

He stopped when Goro fell into his arms.

“I’m sorry if I ruined the dinner. It’s that I- I don’t really know how to deal with myself right now,” the twink admitted.

“What did I do wrong?” the clown daddy asked him. “Why get up and go so suddenly?!”

The burger wasn’t just a shitty meal. It wasn’t just a sandwich with soft bread buns and a 100% chicken patty, crisp shredded lettuce filling dripping with cheese that was 20 cents off on Tuesdays. It was a symbol of their love.

Mediocre. And reproducible.

Goro gave a quick look around the room, unable to find Jared.

“I don’t feel loved enough. No, I feel like you don’t love me as much as I hoped you did.”

“Baby gorl,” Ronald said through a breathless chuckle, “what on earth would make you think that?”

“It’s Jared,” he said, venom in his tone. “You care more about an insect than you do about me.”

Still embracing him, Ronald’s head and afro (they are separate entities) fell onto Goro’s shoulder.

“He’s special to me, sure, he’s been my beloved pet for years now. But your fat ass and fat heart mean so much more to me, my dear.”

Goro’s grip tightened. He told himself not to cry.

“Do you love me? Like  _ that _ ? Like guys who fuck each other without socks on?” Goro pressed.

“Of course I love you,” said Ronald.

“Oh god oh fuck! I love you so much, Papi!”

The two broke into an intense make-out session. It helped that Goro had been naked since he left the restaurant (yeah you forgot about that didn’t you?) as it meant Ronald didn’t have to rip his clothes off.

It was only a matter of time before Goro was getting railed on the sofa with a vacant look in his eyes as he got his brains fucked out. Thrust after thrust of Ronald’s cock in his scrumptious bussy reminded him of his words a 20 minutes earlier.

He wanted ‘of course I love you’ written on his skin in hickeys.

Knowing that daddy’s train to PoundTown was fuelled by love, not just lust, somehow made the whole thing more blissful.

Ronald pulled out his massive schlong and Goro felt like half his organs came out with it. He picked him up with ease and bent him over the foot stool only to eviscerate his sexy little intestines all over again.

He was sinking deeper into mindless ecstasy when he saw the front door open. Suddenly he was back on planet earth.

“J-JARED?!?”

The cockroach was back, with impeccable bad timing.

It’s tiny face and antenna looked like >:o

“Jared, darling! Sorry about this. Could you go back outside? Daddy’s busy.” Ronald’s words came out frantic as he rushed over his pet.

But it was too late.

Jared stumbled around on his 6 legs, looking faint. Seconds later he fell onto his back.

And died of shock.

Ronald’s scream was ungodly.

He was on his knees, weeping, calling out Jared’s name. He thumbed Jared’s antenna.

There being no movement, having to release what they meant, Ronald just couldn’t take it.

His quiet muttering of “this can’t be happening, it just can’t be” hit Goro’s ears. The twink knew what he needed to do.

Crawling over, he pushed Ronald’s hulk of a body out the way and pressed his pinkie finger on Jared’s chest to give him CPR. Without hesitation, he pressed his lips to the roaches and gave the kiss of life.

Ronald sat on the floor next to him, hand on his chest. “You know you’re not meant to use tongue right?”

But Goro was persistent. Sweat dripped for his forehead as he pushed forward to save Jared’s life.

Then, all of a sudden, Jared twitched awake. Uncertain of his surroundings, he managed to flip over onto his feet. At first afraid of the two sweaty naked men staring him down, when he came to recognise their faces, Jared flung himself into Ronald’s arms.

“You saved him baby gorl! Oh I’m so glad you’re okay!”

The roach ran along the arm of the yellow pantsuit and crawled onto Goro’s shoulder, where he planted a small insecty kiss on his cheek.

With a smile of fondness on his face, Goro pet him.

“I think he really likes me.”

Ronald lent over and kissed the other cheek.

“I can definitely see this working.”

Overcome with affection, the two went back to kissing. Jared crawled down the twink’s arm, onto his thigh, and just when Goro thought he’d dropped to the floor, he felt a very odd sensation.

He yelped, and looked down aghast.

And a little turned on.

Which was pretty usual these days.

“What’s wrong??”

“I… I think he’s inside me…”

[ Just gonna leave this here. ](https://activechristianity.org/why-do-i-need-salvation)

Ronald and Goro stared in shameless delight. Jared was running around inside the twink’s foreskin. It was hard not to moan, not to let redness consume his face.

“He really,  _ really _ likes me, huh? I-Is this normal? Has he ever done this before?”

“Not once,” he said, amazed.

The two were panting for a few seconds before Ronald asked to keep going.

He was more gentle with destroying Goro’s ass now that he knew Jared was inside him. He positioned him nicely on the sofa and caressed him when he had the chance.

Goro was long gone. Eyes rolling back in his head, knees buckling inwards, mouth agape and tongue out, having clown daddy’s schlong inside him while being jerked off so intimately by Jared… He’d lost all semblance of reality, spurting out random noise like a lewd scatman.

And eventually every erotic touch culminated - he chased the feeling further until his soul left his body. Barely clinging onto consciousness, he felt naked when Ronald and Jared exited his body. His world became black and he fell into a dreamless sleep.

When his eyes fluttered open, he was laying on Ronald’s bed, Egyptian silk sheets covering him. Jared was sitting on the edge of the bed smoking a cigarette.

He gave a contempt sigh. Domestic happiness at its finest. He’d work every day for the rest of his life (he will) if it meant he came home to this.

Just a slave, his clown daddy, and their pet cockroach.

**Author's Note:**

> This is technically chapter 3 of Ronald's Capitalist Slave, but I couldn’t write them off as part 1 and part 2 since another lovely member of the Goronald Nation posted the first part for me (ya know, getting an ‘invite’ for ao3 and all that complicated things). Please go visit the discord. We have ice cream, fan art, and treachery!  
> I may be lying about the ice cream.  
> 
> 
> god you wanna join the [goronald discord server](https://discord.gg/WnGf3TyJdR) soooooooo bad


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